How To Learn Remotely

first make sure everyone can hear you
then ask for a little help
with a fuzzy math problem like

how long did it take Shakespeare to spell
nonsense in a hot bowl of alphabet soup
count three hares on a rabbit’s foot
and kiss his lucky ass goodbye

then because it’s your God-given right
to deny the separation of Church and State
explain Genesis to your baroque music teacher
a Peter Gabriel fan
like he’s a child

then with two unnumbered pencils
compose a five-syllable essay
describing how it felt
to slide with your absent father
down bamboo chutes and ladders
in the blink of an eye

then enjoy a game of freeze tag