Writing Saves My Life

I feel the need to explain myself to myself. I feel the need to analyze every aspect of my (inner) life. Why am I thinking the thoughts I’m thinking right now? What do my thoughts say about me? If I’m being hyper-critical, how am I responding to my hyper-critical thoughts? Am I challenging my hyper-critical thoughts, or am I using them to support irrational beliefs that I’m inherently weak and irrevocably damaged? Why am I writing—again—about my thoughts?

I have so much to live for, so much to look forward to. Still, when my overthinking goes into overdrive, I find myself returning to thoughts of suicide. I don’t have any plans, just a vague sense that death is easier than (my) life. When these thoughts arise, I hold on to my life. I think of at least one reason to stay alive.

For now, I must be patient. Healing takes time. I’ll keep writing because writing saves my life.

2 thoughts on “Writing Saves My Life

  1. How to Prosper August 20, 2021 / 10:01 am

    Writing saves your life and changes the lives of those lucky enough to read your writing.

    Thank you for sharing this my friend.

    Like

  2. Charles B. Snoad August 20, 2021 / 10:13 am

    Thank you very much. Your words mean a lot to me. Be well.

    Liked by 1 person

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